Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
High-rise Construction | Apr 22, 2015
Architects propose sustainable ‘vertical city’ in the Sahara
Designers aim to make the 1,476-foot tower sustainable, relying on rainwater collection, solar power, and geothermal energy.
Architects | Apr 22, 2015
Architecture Billings Index accelerates in March
For the second consecutive month, the Architecture Billings Index indicated a modest increase in design activity in March.
Green | Apr 22, 2015
AIA Committee on the Environment recognizes Top 10 Green Projects
Seattle's Bullitt Center and the University Center at The New School are among AIA's top 10 green buildings for 2015.
Museums | Apr 22, 2015
Check out Ralph Johnson's stunning nature-inspired Shanghai museum
The newly opened Shanghai Natural History Museum, designed by Perkins+Will’s Global Design Director Ralph Johnson, mimics the shape of a nautilus shell, and features natural elements throughout.
Green | Apr 22, 2015
GSA's Federal Center South Building honored with AIA Top Ten Plus Award for 'verified' sustainable performance
The annual award recognizes green building projects that have quantifiable metrics demonstrating the performance and positive impact of the sustainable design.
Architects | Apr 21, 2015
Megatrends shaping commercial building design
Gensler’s 2015 Design Forecast focuses on how changes in demographics, workplace preferences, and technology are affecting how and why structures get built.
Office Buildings | Apr 21, 2015
Stop the endless debate over open vs. closed work environments
Rather than be confused by the constant stream of opinions, leadership teams contemplating workplace investments should start with powerful employee engagement strategies that drive results.
BIM and Information Technology | Apr 21, 2015
Software tools shouldn't dictate the AEC process
With over 200 solutions on the market, construction software is one of the most complex and fragmented markets, writes Gensler's Mark Thole.
Cultural Facilities | Apr 20, 2015
Jean Nouvel loses court battle against Philharmonie de Paris over alleged design ‘sabotage’
Nouvel boycotted the January opening of the facility and asked for his name to be removed from all references to the work.
Contractors | Apr 20, 2015
Too many construction projects don’t meet owners’ expectations: KPMG report
Causes for delays, overruns, and underperformance include project management talent shortages, distrust between owners and contractors, and the lack of fully integrated project management systems.
