Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| Dec 17, 2014
USGBC announces 2014 Best of Green Schools honorees
Houston's Monarch School was named the K-12 school of the year, and Western Michigan University was honored as the top higher-ed institution, based on environmental programs and education efforts.
| Dec 17, 2014
ULI report looks at growing appeal of micro unit apartments
New research from the Urban Land Institute suggests that micro units have staying power as a housing type that appeals to urban dwellers in high-cost markets who are willing to trade space for improved affordability and proximity to downtown neighborhoods.
| Dec 17, 2014
11 predictions for high-rise construction in 2015
In its annual forecast, the Council on Tall Buildings and Urban Habitat predicts that 2015 will be the "Year of the Woodscraper," and that New York’s troubled B2 modular high-rise project will get back on track.
| Dec 17, 2014
Demand softens, but outlook for Architecture Billings Index remains positive
The AIA's Architecture Billings Index for November was 50.9, down from a mark of 53.7 in October. Despite the drop, the ABI continued its seven-month run of positive scores (above 50).
Sponsored | | Dec 16, 2014
Quadcopters save project team $15K in warranty work
On a recent trip to see what technology Todd Wynne and the rest of the team at Rogers-O’Brien Construction have been tinkering with, I had a chance to experience firsthand which new hardware innovations will one day be applied in the AEC space.
| Dec 16, 2014
Architect Eli Attia sues Google over tall building technology
Attia and tech company Max Sound Corp. have brought a lawsuit against Google because of Flux, a Google X-developed startup launched in 2014. Flux creates software to design environmentally-friendly buildings in a cost-effective way.
| Dec 15, 2014
SHoP Architects plans to turn NY's Seaport District into pedestrianized, mixed-use area
The scheme includes a proposed 500-foot luxury residential tower that would jut out into the harbor, extending the Manhattan grid out into the waterfront.
| Dec 15, 2014
Frank Lloyd Wright School of Architecture launches fundraising campaign for independent incorporation
The Frank Lloyd Wright Foundation announced today that it approved a possible path toward independent incorporation of the Frank Lloyd Wright School of Architecture by raising $2 million before the end of 2015.
| Dec 15, 2014
Studio Gang tapped for American Museum of Natural History expansion
Chicago-based Studio Gang Architects has been commissioned to design the $325 million Gilder Center for Science, Education and Innovation at the American Museum of Natural History in New York.
| Dec 12, 2014
Dunkin’ Donuts launches certification for green restaurant buildings
The company aims to build 100 new DD Green-certified restaurants by the end of 2016.
