Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| May 15, 2014
Biking to work up by 60 percent, according to Census Bureau report
Many U.S. cities are seeing an increase in bicycle commuters, according to new a U.S. Census Bureau report. While bicyclists still account for just 0.6% of all commuters, some of the nation's largest cities have more than doubled their rates since 2000.
| May 15, 2014
'Virtually indestructible': Utah architect applies thin-shell dome concept for safer schools
At $94 a square foot and "virtually indestructible," some school districts in Utah are opting to build concrete dome schools in lieu of traditional structures.
| May 15, 2014
First look: 9/11 Memorial Museum opens to first-responders, survivors, 9/11 families [slideshow]
The 110,000-sf museum is filled with monumental artifacts from the tragedy and exhibits that honor the lives of every victim of the 2001 and 1993 attacks.
| May 14, 2014
New study shows employees aren't happier working in green buildings
People working in buildings certified under LEED’s green building standard appear no more satisfied with their workplace environments than those in conventional buildings, according to new research from the University of California, Berkeley, and the University of Nottingham.
| May 14, 2014
Construction growth looking up: Gilbane Spring 2014 Economic Report
Construction spending for 2014 should finish 6.6% higher than in 2013, with nonresidential work contributing substantially.
| May 14, 2014
Prefab payback: Mortenson quantifies cost and schedule savings from prefabrication techniques
Value-based cost-benefit analysis of prefab approaches on the firm's 360-bed Exempla Saint Joseph Heritage Project shows significant savings for the Building Team.
| May 13, 2014
First look: Nadel's $1.5 billion Dalian, China, Sports Center
In addition to five major sports venues, the Dalian Sports Center includes a 30-story, 440-room, 5-star Kempinski full-service hotel and conference center and a 40,500-square-meter athletes’ training facility and office building.
| May 13, 2014
Drexel University case study report: Green Globes cheaper, faster than LEED
GBI’s Green Globes certification process is significantly less expensive to conduct and faster to complete than LEED certification, says Drexel prof.
| May 13, 2014
Steven Holl's sculptural Institute for Contemporary Art set to break ground at VCU
The facility will have two entrances—one facing the city of Richmond, Va., the other toward VCU's campus—to serve as a connection between "town and gown."
| May 13, 2014
Universities embrace creative finance strategies
After Moody’s and other credit ratings agencies tightened their standards a few years ago, universities had to become much more disciplined about their financing mechanisms.
