Women often tell me that they are afraid of negotiation, that they either just do not know how to do it to get what they want or that they do not have confidence that they will be ready enough for any negotiation.
Whether it is a salary negotiation, bidding on a job, or solving a problem on a job site, you can have an effective negotiation and get the results you seek following some logical and well-planned steps.
The very first step is to start in your own head. The voices in our heads often dissuade us of our ability to successfully negotiate. Just say "no" to those voices!
Negotiation does not need to be equated with conflict. In fact, starting with thinking about the issue as a problem to solve and that your negotiation partner is part of your process in reaching a solution will help reorient your view. Because women are natural collaborators, if we approach our negotiations as getting a deal done rather than getting a "win," we are more likely to enter the process with confidence. And confidence will get you halfway to your goal!
Your mindset—how you look at the world and your attitudes that influence how you interpret situations—plays a key role in how you negotiate. Often our mindset in a negotiation is that we are in opposition to our negotiation partner. In many situations, your negotiation partner may hold an opposing view or position. However, if you start with the mindset that your "opponent" is instead your "partner" in reaching your goal, your entire mindset and all of your resulting actions will change.
Instead of, "I can't believe they won't give me a raise," think, "I can explain to you why a raise will be beneficial not only for me but also for the firm." You can see how your discussion will automatically change.
In addition, when you enter into a discussion with this collaborative mindset , you tap into your natural tendency to find effective solutions and carry an inherent amount of self confidence that will make others want to agree with you.
In relationships, whether they are person or business relationships, no one really wants conflict. If your mindset is such that you are seeking a collaborative solution, others will naturally want to join you on this journey.
Now that your mindset is attuned, we will discuss in my negotiation blog some practical steps to prepare for your negotiation. If you have any comments or questions, please post them and start a dialogue.
Related Stories
| Jan 4, 2011
Product of the Week: Zinc cladding helps border crossing blend in with surroundings
Zinc panels provide natural-looking, durable cladding for an administrative building and toll canopies at the newly expanded Queenstown Plaza U.S.-Canada border crossing at the Niagara Gorge. Toronto’s Moriyama & Teshima Architects chose the zinc alloy panels for their ability to blend with the structures’ scenic surroundings, as well as for their low maintenance and sustainable qualities. The structures incorporate 14,000 sf of Rheinzink’s branded Angled Standing Seam and Reveal Panels in graphite gray.
| Jan 4, 2011
6 green building trends to watch in 2011
According to a report by New York-based JWT Intelligence, there are six key green building trends to watch in 2011, including: 3D printing, biomimicry, and more transparent and accurate green claims.
| Jan 4, 2011
LEED standards under fire in NYC
This year, for the first time, owners of 25,000 commercial properties in New York must report their buildings’ energy use to the city. However, LEED doesn’t measure energy use and costs, something a growing number of engineers, architects, and landlords insist must be done. Their concerns and a general blossoming of environmental awareness have spawned a host of rating systems that could test LEED’s dominance.
| Jan 4, 2011
LEED 2012: 10 changes you should know about
The USGBC is beginning its review and planning for the next version of LEED—LEED 2012. The draft version of LEED 2012 is currently in the first of at least two public comment periods, and it’s important to take a look at proposed changes to see the direction USGBC is taking, the plans they have for LEED, and—most importantly—how they affect you.
| Jan 4, 2011
California buildings: now even more efficient
New buildings in California must now be more sustainable under the state’s Green Building Standards Code, which took effect with the new year. CALGreen, the first statewide green building code in the country, requires new buildings to be more energy efficient, use less water, and emit fewer pollutants, among many other requirements. And they have the potential to affect LEED ratings.
| Jan 4, 2011
New Years resolutions for architects, urban planners, and real estate developers
Roger K. Lewis, an architect and a professor emeritus of architecture at the University of Maryland, writes in the Washington Post about New Years resolutions he proposes for anyone involved in influencing buildings and cities. Among his proposals: recycle and reuse aging or obsolete buildings instead of demolishing them; amend or eliminate out-of-date, obstructive, and overly complex zoning ordinances; and make all city and suburban streets safe for cyclists and pedestrians.
| Jan 4, 2011
An official bargain, White House loses $79 million in property value
One of the most famous office buildings in the world—and the official the residence of the President of the United States—is now worth only $251.6 million. At the top of the housing boom, the 132-room complex was valued at $331.5 million (still sounds like a bargain), according to Zillow, the online real estate marketplace. That reflects a decline in property value of about 24%.
| Jan 4, 2011
Luxury hotel planned for Palace of Versailles
Want to spend the night at the Palace of Versailles? The Hotel du Grand Controle, a 1680s mansion built on palace grounds for the king's treasurer and vacant since the French Revolution, will soon be turned into a luxury hotel. Versailles is partnering with Belgian hotel company Ivy International to restore the dilapidated estate into a 23-room luxury hotel. Guests can live like a king or queen for a while—and keep their heads.
| Jan 4, 2011
Grubb & Ellis predicts commercial real estate recovery
Grubb & Ellis Company, a leading real estate services and investment firm, released its 2011 Real Estate Forecast, which foresees the start of a slow recovery in the leasing market for all property types in the coming year.
| Jan 4, 2011
Furniture Sustainability Standard - Approved by ANSI and Released for Distribution
BIFMA International recently announced formal American National Standards Institute (ANSI) approval and release of the ANSI/BIFMA e3-2010 Furniture Sustainability Standard. The e3 standard represents a structured methodology to evaluate the "sustainable" attributes of furniture products and constitutes the technical criteria of the level product certification program.
